Brianna’s Second Birth Story - A Redemptive Homebirth
TUESDAY, APRIL 4TH, 2023
I was 39 weeks and 4 days. Around 9:30 pm, I sent the following text to both my doula and the midwife team;
“Hey, just giving you a heads up. I have been having a lot of cramping today and have had a few contractions. Nothing that is too painful. I’m going to take a shower and try to go to bed early just in case it becomes something. I’m doubtful that this will become anything tonight or tomorrow but just wanted to let you know just in case.”
By the time I had taken a shower and relaxed enough to go to sleep, contractions had begun to come more often. I felt the intensity of the contractions both in my belly and in my back, so I had a hard time resting during them.
Our 2.5-year-old, Harmony, woke up around 11 pm, and my husband, Wes brought her into our room (which was our norm at this time). Shortly after, I found myself vocalizing during contractions, so I decided to try to get rest in the living room to avoid waking Harmony.
WEDNESDAY, APRIL 5TH, 2023
Around midnight, I decided to start timing the contractions. They were coming anywhere between 4 and 7 minutes apart, and each contraction made me get up and rock. A little over an hour later, I woke Wes and told him that I thought it was almost time to call our team. I paced in the kitchen for a little while and questioned if I was really in labor. I decided to call my doula, Annica. I told Annica that I worried I was just having prodromal labor and began to cry. She encouraged me and suggested that I call the midwife line to get their input and ask Wes to get the birth pool set up. I called the midwife line. Jen answered. She said she would like the contractions to be more consistently close together before she and the team head our way. Jen suggested that I take a bath or shower and see if the contractions space out or stop completely.
While I got into the tub, Wes brought Harmony back into her room so that the birth pool could be set up in our bedroom. I was in the tub for about an hour, and it became clear to us that the contractions were not going to stop.
Around 2:30 am, I asked Wes to call my mom to come for Harmony support. Originally the plan was for her to just be on-call, but we both worried that she would wake again before the night was over. I didn’t want Wes to have to leave my side, I knew I would need him near me. My contractions had gotten closer together, and I experienced some labor shakes after getting out of the tub. I messaged Annica and asked her to head over.
I made my way into our bedroom and began playing my “Here Comes Harper” playlist. Annica arrived just after 3 am, as I was on my elbows and knees. At this point, my back labor was getting worse, and I felt great relief when Wes rubbed my lower back and hips. After a contraction passed, I greeted Annica and joked that only crazy people willingly decide to go through labor again. Annica suggested we start to fill the birth pool. Wes stepped out of the room, and while he was gone, I had a contraction without him rubbing my back. When he returned, I joked that while I was having back labor, he wasn’t allowed to leave me.
Our water line to the birth pool was not working well, and water would spray all over the bathroom each time Wes turned the water on. So, Wes and Annica began heating water on the stove to help fill the birth pool. My mom arrived not too long after Annica. Even though others tried, no one seemed to rub my back in the same way or bring me the same relief as when Wes did it.
About an hour later, Harmony woke up again, and my mom went in to cuddle with her. I had a feeling that she probably wouldn’t go back to sleep again, but it helped to know that I didn’t need to worry about her.
My back labor started to feel overwhelming, so I decided to try the Miles Circuit. I now had no concept of time and relied on Annica to tell me when to switch positions. Between two contractions, Annica noticed Wes’s TMNT shirt. Wes began talking about his love for the show and movies when another contraction started. I started to vocalize, and Wes cut his sentence short by saying, “Okay, I’ll tell you later”. (At that moment I thought it was funny and wanted to laugh, but my contraction took so much concentration that I couldn’t.) When it was time to switch to the third position, I was worried if I should since my back labor hadn’t seemed to get much better during the first two positions. Annica encouraged me to finish the circuit and see how using the birth sling would help.
This upright position was hard for me to maintain. When each contraction came on, I just wanted to double over and get down on the floor. Wes sat on the edge of the bed in front of me so I could lean into him. I began feeling very overwhelmed, and when Wes said, “You’re doing great,” I replied, “Am I?? Because I don’t feel like it.” I told Wes that each contraction felt like my lower back was breaking open. I noticed I was tensing my body, I tried horse lips and let my shoulders drop away from my ears. Annica said “How about we call Jen after this next contraction?” and I agreed.
At 5 am, Wes called the midwife line, asking the team to head our way. Right after Wes called Jen, I began to feel nauseous. As soon as I tried to stand up straight and said, “I feel like I’m going to be sick”, I vomited. I vomited so much that we couldn’t tell if I was peeing myself or if my water broke.
I sat on the toilet and then got in the shower to clean up before getting into the birth pool. Annica asked if I was feeling pushy while I was vomiting, and I told her that I couldn’t tell. She called Jen back and said that I had vomited and that we couldn’t tell whether or not my water broke.
I got into the birth pool and felt relief from my back labor. I had one or two contractions in the pool before I began to feel lots of pressure and the urge to push. At 5:11 am, Annica decided that we should call Jen again and keep her on speakerphone until she arrived. Contractions spaced out a little bit, but I welcomed the opportunity to rest. Wes was kneeling at the edge of the birth pool by my head, and I reclined to hold onto him with both hands.
At 5:24 am, during one of the contractions, I followed the urge to push, and I felt my bag of waters burst. As soon as I said, “my water just broke,” I heard Jen enter the room as she said, “Yes, I can see the clear and cloudy fluid. You’re doing great.” Once the contraction passed, I opened my eyes and greeted Jen with a smile. During the following contraction, I felt my perineum stretching, and Jen said she could see Harper’s head beginning to peek out. I remembered to breathe easily and allow my body to stretch. I tried to remember to let my butt sink down and keep my pelvic floor relaxed. As Harper’s head began to crown, I supported my body as it stretched.
Between contractions, I found that swiping my hips from side to side in the water helped me keep my pelvic floor relaxed. During the next contraction, I followed my body’s lead and pushed. Wes, who was still positioned above my head, said “Wow! I can see her head!” and that gave me so much energy.
At 5:27 am, Harper’s head was out, and I felt so much relief knowing that with one more push she would be out and in my arms. During the last push, I felt Harper’s body descending. I heard Jen say, “Wait, let me get her cord out of the way,” because Harper had a nuchal cord.
HARPER IS BORN!
Our second babe, Harper Elliana Trammell, was born at 5:28 am. I looked down to reach and pull Harper out of the water, and I could see that her eyes were open and that she was looking towards me. I brought Harper up onto my chest and rubbed her back gently while we looked deep into each other’s eyes. Harper took her first breath on my chest and let out a couple of strong cries. Jen reassured us that she looked great and put a towel over Harper to keep her warm. Harper took in the world around her with such curiosity while Wes and I studied her face. Emily, one of the student midwives, arrived right after the birth and helped Jen with Harper’s assessments.
A few minutes after Harper was born, I heard Harmony’s sound machine turn off in her room, and both she and my mom made their way into the room to meet Harper. As soon as Harmony saw her baby sister, I saw such love in her eyes as she said, “Baby Harper is here!” Harmony made her way around the birth pool and stood above my head by Wes so that she could see Harper’s face. After a few minutes, Harmony asked, “Mommy you swimming with baby Harper? Can I swim too?” and I said yes. Wes took her to get her swimsuit on, and she joined us in the birth pool.
About 20 minutes after Harper was born, I felt the urge to birth my placenta, and Jen guided me as I pushed. Wes cut the umbilical cord. After a little more time, Jen suggested we make our way into bed. Wes held Harper for the first time while I got into bed. Once I was settled, Harper was back in my arms and ready for her first latch. Jen brought me some juice, and I asked my mom to make breakfast for everyone. Ashley, a certifying midwife on the team, arrived.
Around 7 am, Emily began Harper’s newborn exam on our bed. Harper weighed 7 lbs 11.81 oz and was 20.5 inches long.
Harmony watched very closely and helped Emily by taking Harper’s temperature. After the newborn exam, Wes spent more time bonding with Harper while I got up with assistance to get cleaned up in the bathroom.
When I returned to bed, Harper was given back to me for more skin-to-skin. After some time Ashley came over to take my vitals and asked how I was feeling. I replied, “I’m good!” And then, at that moment, all my feelings came to the surface. I began to cry. I told Ashley and Emily;
“It's finally hitting me. I’m good. And she’s good. And we’re both healthy. It just feels like all my fears going into this birth weren't needed or necessary.”
That was such a healing moment for me. I had a lot of fears surface in the weeks before Harper’s birth. I hadn’t given myself the time to process my first birth. My postpartum hemorrhage and subsequent hypovolemic shock caused me to lose consciousness after Harmony’s birth because of a gap in my care. I had moved past it quickly in an attempt to make others comfortable and make it “less scary”. But here I was, in my safe space (our home), holding our second baby, and both of us were completely healthy. We didn’t face a single traumatic experience during or after her birth.
I am incredibly grateful to my husband, mom, doula, and amazing midwife team at West Michigan Midwifery for their care and support. They helped me feel safe, seen, and well cared for, and because of that, Harper’s birth was beautiful, freeing, and healing.
This birth story (or something similarly peaceful and redemptive) is something I wish every family could experience.
All images are by Annica Quakenbush of Sprout and Blossom Birth.
